Episode VIII My Version
by bugintheforest
Summary: my ideas for episode viii... i have a tendency of thinking out how things will go... just happen to be writing this one down. original character (kira) is mine, the rest is disney's and lucasfilms. work in progress...as it keeps growing... :)
1. Chapter 1

"No! No! Come back!" Every time she thought about that day, that's all she could remember; just the tears. The plea to not be left behind.

But now, it was like a fog was lifting. Still hazy, but there were fragments creeping through. Another voice. Soothing…attempting to be anyway.

A face… Similar to hers… Down to the tears.

"If there were any other way…" A pause. A moment to compose. A need to demonstrate strength - enough to inspire it… "I promise you - you will be alright. But you must stay here."

The haze renewed. Everything she had just regained felt like it was slipping through her fingers…

"You must stay. I will be back. I will come for you. But you must stay here…"

The images faded more. She felt like she was adrift in a void and clinging to the edge of a cliff at the same time.

"I have to go back. I have to go back. She won't come if I'm not there…" It was barely a whisper and she opened her eyes, confused as to why she even said it. The conflict was so strong though - she knew it was foolish to go back, but that desire to do as the voice said…

"Rey."

She looked up to find wise, sad eyes looking back at her. "Maz was right, wasn't she? The…that person…woman…who left me on Jakku… She's gone."

Head in her hands, she kneaded her head as if she could rub the haziness away. When she looked up again, she found the same sad look - the same one he had given her when she pulled the lightsaber out of her bag and held it out to him.

Sad. Knowing.

"I… We both… I believe it was done with your safety in mind. To protect you."

"But why? Who am I? I'm not that important."

A slight smirk, there and then gone. "We can't know that without knowing who it was that…left you."

She closed her eyes to try and see it again. "I…I can't… The closer I get, the more the memory slips away…"

"Someone has blocked your memory. Hidden it away. Everything you knew before Jakku. It's why Be-… Kylo couldn't see it."

"Who could have done that?"

He hesitated. "Someone…with the ability to use the force. In some way…"

"A Jedi?"

"Not…not necessarily. But…it doesn't seem to be aiding the dark side…"

They both paused, using the silence to consider.

"I know you want to know. To understand. But…"

It was her turn to smirk. Hers, however, didn't fade as fast. "It will come when it comes. There are other things more easily focused on."

He returned the smile; but as she turned and walked away, that same sad knowledgable look returned.


	2. Chapter 2

"She'll break through it sooner or later…" He hadn't heard her walk up. Or see her. But he knew she was there just the same.

"No thanks to you, of course."

He turned to her then to see the mock-scolding smile on her face. He couldn't help but return it, even as he pondered yet again the wonder that she was.

Looking at her, you wouldn't be able to tell anything about her. She was older than she looked, which led most to mistake her for a young, unexperienced girl. The clothes she wore were black and various shades of gray, loose fitting hiding the figure underneath. Her hair appeared muddy brown, until light set it aflame. He found himself sad that she had it braided back, instead of her wild curls.

None of this gave anyone the impression she was anything but the persona she put forth.

But here eyes... That's where the true story laid. Forest of moss, old as stars. It had taken years to reach that level of trust, but she'd opened up eventually...

Hadn't she?

He had been looking at her as he thought, could see her clear as day. But as he watched her walk towards him, she seemed to...flicker. Just for a moment. Like a glitch in a holo.

"Damn it, Kira. You did it to me too."

The smile lingered for a moment before fading - her turn to match him.

"You hid away on a deserted island for twenty years. Just you...and your thoughts. (a pause) I'm surprised it took you so long."

"Kira…"

"You know why."

"She knows nothing of who she is."

"She's safer that way."

"She needs to focus."

"She's stronger than both of us."

"And that's what I'm afraid of!" He had been pacing, but turned to her. "She's our daughter, Kira. That combination-"

"Is why she shouldn't be anywhere near Snoke. That's why I've done everything I've done. To protect her. Protect both of you." A pause. She watched as he looked away, a look of guilt flickering over him. "Oh Luke... It wasn't your fault. Ben- It wasn't you."

"It wasn't you either." He matched her gaze. "You couldn't have convinced Snoke any more than I could Ben." A pause. "And now he has you both."

She reached up to brush a hand against his cheek. He felt nothing but a breeze of air.

"Luke…"

"Come home." She turned away and he moved to keep the eye contact. "We can do more together. You know that. And we both know the danger of you being that...close to the dark…"

"What about Ben?"

"What about Rey?"

"Don't." For a moment the fire of her hair drifted to her eyes. A forest alight.

"Ben is lost."

"He's not-"

"He killed Han! He killed his father."

The silence rang with the memory of another father. Another son.

"It's tearing him apart. He's lost because the conflict within him didn't diminish like Snoke assured him it would."

"And what can you do? As Snoke's…lackey..."

"He has me going to Ben...as Vader." At his incredulous look, she hurried on. "I go as Anakin."

"How does that help?"

"Anakin Skywalker was as bullied and used as Ben is now."

"So are you." He watched as she looked away. Almost abashed. "You didn't come here to argue, I'm sure."

"You have to go back."

"I... I can't. What about Rey? She's still just at the beginning of her training…"

"And you've never experienced training on the go?" She smirked and it was his turn to look away.

"I... Leia…"

"Leia doesn't hate you." She raised her hand to make him look at her and he subconsciously followed. "She's lost her son, now her husband. She needs her brother."

"And I need you."

She gave him a sad smile. "I have never left you. Or Rey. You are both my everything - my reason for doing what I do. You are my light. If anything were to happen... I would have nothing to bring me back."

She reached again for his face. He could almost feel her hand that time... Cold. "Wake up Luke."

There was screaming and explosions.

 _Wake up…_

A sinister whisper... A sinister laugh...

 _Wake...up..._

He sat up with a start, his cloak bunched around him.

"Master... Luke...? Um...is everything alright?"

He ran a hand through his hair, memories flowing - hazy, but clearing. The barrier Kira had put up falling away. "Chewie will be here in a few hours. We should pack."

"Are... We're going somewhere?"

He looked up at her then - seeing her anew with all the reclaimed memories behind it.

"Home. We're going home."


	3. Chapter 3

No one was really surprised at the importance put into the man who called himself "Finn". General Organa had said it for all of them - it had been incredibly brave. True - people left the Resistance (even the Rebellion before). It was a free order. Come and go - we are always looking for more; we will hate to see you go.

But the First Order? Brought up from the ashes of the Empire before it?

The young comm-tech officer stood in the alcove and watched the two men talking in the corner opposite.

A rebel and an ex-trooper.

Poe Dameron had been a frequent visitor to med-bay as Finn recovered from his injuries. And when his new friend found himself alive but not the in the same shape he had been, Poe had been right there with him with motivation and a helping hand.

As Lt. Connix watched the two men, she couldn't help but deduce what they were discussing. She couldn't hear them, but telling by the dark looks on both of their faces...

She'd heard the rumors of what happened on Starkiller Base... All of what happened...

Her musings were cut off by the appearance of General Organa and the rest of the planning committee.

"Lt. Connix. Perfect timing." Leia motioned her to the table as the other officers took their favorite spots. The general made no motion or comment to the two in the corner, but they quietly finished their conversation and joined the group.

With a nod from the general, Connix stepped forward and inserted a data-chip into the table.

"After further analysis of the data we've received, we are almost positive this is the current location of Snoke's mobile command post."

"Almost?"

She turned and addressed the resistance's star pilot as the projection of a star map finished generating. "Snoke has been almost passionately paranoid in insuring his location stays unknown. The fact that we have the amount of information we do is...a miracle."

"It's not a miracle."

"Luke." The room literally rang with shock as everyone followed Leia's gaze across to find that most elusive of Jedi - Luke Skywalker - standing just behind Lt. Connix.

Most just as quickly turned back to the map in front of them to avoid looking at the flash of unspoken communication between Jedi and general.

All but one that is.

"Rey!"

"Finn!"

The two new-old friends rushed towards each other, breaking the odd silences as easily as they embraced. This was followed by a torrent of simultaneous questions and answers between the two and giggles from the rest of the room.

A quiet cough cut through and both turned sheepish looks to Leia. She gave them a rare smirk before turning, herself, to her brother.

"I have a feeling you have more to say on this matter? Lt. Connix may be a bit...extravagant in her description, but-"

"It's a trap." There were a few sidelong glances to the venerable admiral sitting to one side of the table, but the serious tone of the statement stifled any thoughts of laughter.

Admiral Statura took a step forward. "As the lieutenant pointed out, Snoke has not been easy to track. The data we have collected has been years incoming. And then carefully analyzed."

"I don't doubt the skill of your officers, Admiral. They just happen to be missing a piece of...helpful information."

"And what would that be, sir?"

"Supreme Leader Snoke does not send holonet communications."

"Umm...excuse me Mr. Skywalker…sir…" Finn took a step forward and seemed to wilt under the older man's gaze.

"Finn, right?"

He turned to look at Rey. She gave him a small encouraging grin and he continued. "Yes...um...right. I have to disagree, sir. Snoke was never personally on the Starkiller Base. How else would you expect him to be communicating with Hux and Ren and the rest?"

"I said he was not using the holonet. Not that he wasn't communicating. (a pause) There are ways of communication without technology."

"The Force?"

Luke turned back to his sister and saw the obvious tag to that question on her face. "The Force, yes. This particular...technique could very much be considered…dark."

Poe spoke up with the thought of many others in the room. "Not that we don't... The Force is obviously strong for, well, some. But...how exactly…?"

Leia and Rey both successfully managed to hide their grins at Luke's automatic lecture mode.

"Most may know - or at least heard rumors and stories - of Jedi being able to trick the mind of others, even reading minds. But there are some who can excel in these skills - enter the mind through dreams or take thoughts from one and project them to others. This last is very similar to the idea of a holo communication, but without the traceable data."

Statura still seemed unconvinced. "As interesting as that is, how can you know that this is how Snoke is indeed communicating with his men? How do we know the data we have is aimed for a trap?"

Luke looked down for a moment before answering the admiral with a straight-forward gaze.

"Because, Admiral, I know the woman he is using."


	4. Chapter 4

The silence was filled with unspoken thoughts. And Luke heard them all.

 _Jedi?_

 _Another gone to the dark?_

 _Another infiltrator?_

 _How far is the Masters of Ren's reach?_

 _The First Order's?_

 _Snoke's?_

"Admiral Statura is right." All attention turned to Leia. "The information is evidence of something. If not Snoke directly, it does signify First Order activity in an area they've not been seen in before." She paused. "Something is there – trap or no. And we need every bit we can get."

"One fighter would be able to fly in and out no problem, General." Poe stepped up to the table with a quick grip of Finn's shoulder to quiet his friend's argument. "I'll have BB-8 capturing every bit of data he can get."

The general gave him a knowing smile, but Luke saw the hint of something else behind it.

A roguish pilot on a suicide mission...

"As capable as I know both you and BB-8 are, I would suggest a few other members of Rapier squadron accompany you."

"We'd hate to have a repeat of the _Yissira Zyde_ incident..." Karé Kun gave a wink across the table to her fellow Rapier.

"Yeah, yeah..." Poe returned the wink with a smirk, as he got a friendly elbow from Snap Wexley.

"Alright, Commander, you have your mission. And your warning." Leia paused to give a nod in Luke's direction. "I want a fully realized plan before I give permission to fly. Lt. Connix," she continued as she turned to the young officer, "be sure to continue tracking that data. We'll need all updates – any changes – as soon as possible."

There were nods of assent and the gathering broke up in a variety of smaller groups. Leia made her way to her borther as folks moved out, pausing here and there to confer with some and promise to meet up later with others. Statura was dead set on discussing the possible informant, but Leia managed to persuade him to leave it to her.

Luke waited for her patiently, leaning against the edge of an alcove. "Leia-"

"I know, I know. I'm not ignoring your warning, Luke. But I meant what I said – we need all the information we can get." She paused, taking in the image of the man standing in front of her. A thousand different questions on the tip of her tongue. Questions of a mother... A sister... A general... "I..." A sigh. "Who is the woman?"

His gaze turned a bit, but she knew immediately she had read it wrong. Not with anger...but sadness. Always so sad, her brother. There were days she couldn't seem to picture that young, optimistic farmboy. And that, in turn, made her sad.

"It's... It's Kira..."


	5. Chapter 5

"Kira...?" It took her a moment. The name meant nothing to her at first, but then it was like a curtain was raised and memories came rolling in. Luke watched the recognition come across her face and couldn't help but feel a little...pride. Proud at Kira's obvious skill, but more in his sister's ability to break through it. "Oh...Luke... How?"

"She went willingly..." He recognized the confusion on her face and continued, "She...she was hoping that... She hoped that she could be enough. To distract Snoke from coming after Ben. After..." A pause. "She is hoping she can hep us – help Ben – from that side."

Leia still seemed confused, again picking and choosing from a torrent of questions. "Why... How did she think she could...?"

"There is more to Kira than you know." He paused again and leaned forward – part confidant, part storyteller. "Back during the Clone Wars, Palpatine hired a bounty hunter to beak into the Jedi temple on Coruscant and steal a holocron. The Jedi retrieved the holocron – still sealed – and moved on. Except it wasn't the same one from the library – it was a copy meant to make the Jedi believe it hadn't been opened."

"And...on the holocron..."

"Names. Hundreds...thousands of names of Force-sensitive children. Children who would one day be invited to become a Jedi."

"What would Palpatine want with..."

The ideas passed over her face like words in a book. He hesitated in telling her she was right...

"No one knew at the time... There's only two incidents the Jedi recorded of children being abducted. One, shortly after the holocron incident, by the same bounty hunter. Another a few years before the Battle of Yavin. Both cases – Jedi were successful in returning the children to their parents."

"I still don't- Kira...Kira was one of those children?"

"One of the unknown number of children the Emperor managed to...gather. We've always thought that the Sith worked in pairs – a master and an apprentice. Whatever the Emperor's views and ideas were publicly, his personal plans..."

They both sat, each pondering the implications of an Emperor with more plots than what were already known...

How much of that the First Order had at their disposal...

"How did she..." Leia wasn't sure how to ask...or if she wanted to know the answer.

"Transport crash of all things." He couldn't help but smile at the...ordinariness of it. "She was maybe, 10... Age for Kira is a bit...well...if Palpatine was searching for a way to cheat aging, he missed out when she disappeared. As far as she could remember, it was a simple move from one secret base to another. The pilot had been involved in a skirmish earlier and then sent on this transit – just tired. Ran into a small shuttle, both crashed and she was the only survivor."

He paused, realizing the haze was still hanging on some memories. He couldn't help but realize – eradicating herself from the thoughts of everyone who knew her...it was probably second nature. "She scrapped by, odd jobs here and there. Travelled. The whole time she had to fight the dark that had been...instilled in her. At some point, she ran across a group of rebels. A few Jedi where included. One of them – a Togruta – took her in, said she could help. That she'd been in a...similar situation once."

He went silent, knowing Leia knew the rest of the story. He and Kira ended on similar paths – tracking down the history of a people they barely knew, but seemed to belong.

"How...how was she able to...?"

Luke turned to his sister and saw a look of subtle awe on her face. He could practically read the question – they both knew the emperor. Had both seen the devastating effects of the dark side. Had both felt the pull...

How could someone raised surrounded by, absorbing it into themselves, practically from birth, turn into the the caring, sweet woman Luke had fallen in love with?

"She didn't get rid of it. It's not quite...possible... I think..." He took a moment, trying to find the right words. "She...accepted it. Accepted that she had dark in her. But that that didn't mean she couldn't have light too. She...she found a balance."

Again, the twins fell silent, their thoughts following the same thread. So similar, there was no need for them to speak.

If someone so dark could find light...could find balance...

...there was hope another gone dark could come back...


	6. Chapter 6

_He'd finally found her, sitting up on a rock, looking out at the wide expanse of water. Everything about her said_ relaxed – _from the barefeet to the loose pants and tunic. Even her hair was open to the gentle breeze, ever-so-slightly fiery curls brushing her bare shoulders, making the dark curves of the tattoos on her upper arms appear to dance._

 _As he got closer, though, he realized that view was just that – a view. The tension practically vibrated out toward him in the Force._

" _Hey." He ran a hand down her back as he sat on the rock beside her. She gave him a nod, only turning a hair in his direction. He took it for what it was and turned to take in the view himself._

 _This was why they were here after all – the quiet. Get away form the academy, the bustle of trainees. The hecticness of the growing resistance._

 _Darkness she'd said. She felt darkness. And she wanted to get away and try to understand what it was._

 _To see if it was her._

 _It wasn't a particularly special place. Just out of the way. An inconsequential spot that few people knew of and even fewer came to. The general impression was unimpressive – mostly due to the the rumors of ghosts and demons. He'd heard the same stories most had – hangings, tortures, hallucinogenic clouds leading people in circles and over cliffs. He had been hesitant when she first brought it up, but she'd confided in him – it was an illusion. Just a convincing deterrence to keep it a convenient hideaway._

 _It was their favorite vacation spot._

" _Do you think balance has been reached? In the sense of the prophecy... Do you think Anakin actually...brought it? Shrunk it down to an individual dilemma?"_

 _The question pulled him from his revery and he turned back to her, fully intending on answering, before she continued... "True – on the grand scale, between his...actions at the temple and Order 66, the overall numbers became closer. But, if you consider everything that's happened since... Seems to still be rather...unbalanced towards the dark..."_

 _His original answer faded. The temple at Coruscant had been practically destroyed and it had taken years of digging and sorting to get everything he had. The goal had always been to find more to train Jedi. But part of him wanted to find more about his father. What he had found was...well... He'd understood why Ben had gone with the "certain point of view" route._

 _Not many talked to him or Leia about their father. They didn't either. What happened happened. There was no changing it. It was just..._

 _But to hear the casualness in Kira's voice now... The matter-of-fact way she was discussing the elimination of hundreds of men, women, children..._

" _I...umm... I think it's broader than that." He unconsciously matched her tone. "It isn't that there was more dark. It was more that the light wasn't as...noticeable. I look at it more as a tide." He motioned to the waves in front of them. "The Old Republic was bright, even through the Clone Wars. But the spark of dark that was Palpatine grew and flourished. The Republic faded and the Empire grew. But as it grew, the spark that was left of the Republic turned to become the Rebellion. It grew to replace the Empire, that spark building to become the First Order..._

" _It's just the ebb and flow of the universe. As balanced as it can be. Even if you were to use the old definition of good and evil – Jedi and Sith – you'd still find a bit of...haze. We as Jedi aren't the same as what once was. The old ways are gone, turned into the scraps and bits we know. In a sense, we aren't_ really _Jedi. No more than the Knights of Ren – whoever they are – are Sith."_

" _So...it really is up to us...individually."_

" _Yes...in a sense. We all have to accept that we are made up of both light and dark. Choosing what we do with that, balancing it in our lives –_ that _is a balance in the Force."_

 _He turned back to her then to find her practically crumbling in front of him. The blasé exterior was replaced suddenly with a look of dread._

" _Kira... What is it? Why this sudden theoretical discussion of-"_

" _I'm pregnant."_

 _That threw him. As he silently processed the information, mouth gaping, he grew excited. But that excitement was buffered by the fear she was unconsciously clouding his mind with._

 _It was that lack of control that was really scaring him._

" _Kira... Oh, Kira..." He turned himself completely on the rock, reaching over to her, trying to calm and comfort._

" _I just... I thought maybe..."_

I needed someone to blame. _The thought came to him crystal clear. A plea in the dark._

 _He tried to gather a thought, but she again beat him to it. "I was raised in the dark. Infected with it practically from birth. But I wasn't_ born _with it. What if... How could I not pass it to my own child?"_

" _No, no-"_

" _Or worse! What if I focus all my light, all the good I have, on her. To make sure that doesn't happen. And I can't love her? I turn back to that...that..."_

" _No." He made it as firm as he could, turning her to face him. A hand under her chin had her finally meeting his gaze. "It won't happen. I wouldn't let it. You're not alone anymore Kira. You're safe."_

 _She collapsed into his arms. No tears. Just a slow release of tension. Not completely, but he could tell she was regaining control. The cloud of dread dissipated._

" _We'll be okay," he added. "You'll see. Everything will work out."_

 _They sat for a bit, the silence just as comforting as their closeness. He was hesitant to break it, but a thought occurred to him. "Hey...that's not why you wanted to come here...is it? The dark you were sensing?"_

" _No..." She seemed reluctant to move, but turned to face him nonetheless. "I thought it might have been that... I just wanted to get away and...be sure..."_

" _What is it?"_

" _I...don't know exactly... It feels like...a...haze at times. Others...it's like...eyes. Like someone watching..."_

" _Us?"_

" _Us. The academy. But...casually... There's no real focus... Just...curiosity. But..." She hesitated. "With Ben...there's more focus."_

" _Someone...is watching Ben?"_

" _I don't think it's just watching... He's asked me about your father. Said he wanted to know more about him. The prophecy. Everything that made Vader."_

" _What did you tell him?"_

" _The truth. The good and the bad..."_

 _He took it in. If someone was watching Ben,trying to pull him to the dark through the stories – legends – of Darth Vader..._

" _I know it's selfish...," she stared, but paused. He turned and saw that she had drifted back to staring out at the water. "And...I shouldn't focus on my self and my own worries... As much as I adore your sister and Han... I can't help but think – if someone is so interested in the son of a Force-sensitive military leader and a scruffy ex-smuggler just because he also happens to be the grandson of Anakin Skywalker-"_

 _She paused, meeting his gaze again. Her voice came out a whisper, as if she were trying to hide the thought even from herself. "What would the child of a great Jedi Master and on of the Children of the Emperor be worth?"_

It had been so long ago, that trip. That conversation. They'd come back and Luke had insisted on talking to Leia about it. She'd seemed to sense the same, but couldn't put any more to it than Kira had. He'd promised to look after Ben, make sure to protect him...

 _How did it go wrong...?_

As he sat and watched Rey talking with the two gentlemen sitting with her, he considered everything that had passed. Trying again – with the extra hindsight of his newly recovered memories – to figure out how he could have changed...anything.

"You know Han offered her a job."

He looked up to find Leia holding out a cup of caf. "A job, huh? Was wondering who had convinced Chewie to let her fly the Falcon."

She sat down next to him on the bench, sipping her own drink and taking in the same view. "She's yours, isn't she?" She gave a grin as response to his slightly astonished look.

"When did you get smarter than me?"

"Oh...I've always been smarter than you." She gave him a playful nudge. "Han... Han had told Chewie that he felt like... He didn't know exactly. Just that he needed to look after her. Like...like she was his own child... He swore that no matter what happened – she wasn't going back to Jakku." She paused. "I felt the same when she first showed up."

They sat, watching the trio across the room. Happy, laughing. Almost completely carefree.

"She doesn't know does she?"

Luke nodded. "It's there for her to know. Part of it is Kira's block... But part of it is Rey's fear... Like she doesn't want to know. Safer to not know what you're missing."

Leia finished her drink, patting his knee before standing. She went to step away but turned back.

"You know, I understand why she did it. Sometimes, I wish I could..." She shook her head. "Still...I have to say... She's braver than I am."


End file.
